THE BEST ACCESSORY

This piece isn’t about a necklace, a blouse, or even how a silk scarf has impacted my life.  As you begin to read this story you may feel like it strays a bit from my theme, but by the time that you read the last word I hope you see how it all fits together.  

The last two weeks of my life have been an emotional roller-coaster.  I have come to a shocking realization that life can change drastically when one person is missing from your day.  I never knew how many pieces I would find myself picking up from the day I woke up and he was gone.  The night that we parted ways I walked an entire 40 blocks home.  My senses were in such a furry that I don’t remember making out full faces of the people I passed, or recall a single name of a restaurant on Second Avenue.  All I know is that I carried my head low towards the ground while crying and texting my BFF.  It felt like I was stuck in a bad dream that I had no power in changing.  I had to simply ride the dream out until I woke up to the sound of my alarm clock.  In a matter of minutes my life had changed, and I was going to have to begin making many alterations that I still have not sewn together.  I honestly have no clue when this feeling will be stitched back together, but I am learning along the way.  

My first modification was getting lost in the day.  I am taking on everything imaginable.  I am working longer hours, out every night during the weekend with my family of friends, and filling the rest of my days doing things I love that had somehow found themselves fallen off the grid.  Now, hanging out with friends and doing things I love is NEVER a bad thing, but for now they are acting as a distraction.  I think that my friends are truly a blessing to me.  Without this circle I know that I would not be putting one foot in front of the other each day.  For that, I am very grateful for each of them.   

As a second part of my self-given therapy I prescribed myself one afternoon of shopping at H&M on Broadway and 34^th street.  Retail therapy is always fun. I made out like a bandit with all of my fabulous finds.  I actually already wore every single combination to the office and out at night over the last two weeks.  It makes a girl feel good!  Every time I left in an outfit I made sure I had one thing with me.  It wasn’t a gold necklace, a spritz of perfume or even a pop of color on my lips.  It was a simple thing.  This item is even something that comes free of charge.  I found that my most important accessory is a smile.  No matter how sad I feel as long as I have a smile on my face I am able to make it through the day.  I am now a firm believer in the saying “Smile and the world smiles back at you.”  Your facial expression sets the tone for your whole body.  Don’t get me wrong, the smile is not going to save you from crying during a time like this.  In fact, I think it is healthy to cry or else your emotions can not leave your body.  However, I am saying that by simply adding a smile to each outfit I wear makes my day a bit brighter, it gives me a sense of confidence that I was losing, and most of all it makes others around me smile back.

Smile and the world will smile back at you.  Next time you experience a breakup, a bad day at work, or something small that simply gets you down try throwing on a smile.  It is the one item in your wardrobe that you don’t have to try on for size, or purchase at a store.  It belongs to you always, and will most certainly never go out of style. 

 

As I continue to ride this roller-coaster I am going to make sure I never leave my apartment without my best summer accessory. 

THANK MY LUCKY SKIRT

Memories are a moment in time that you can hold onto forever.  Overtime, memories can sometimes be hard to recall.  Each time you tell the story you tend to forget a detail, or you may forget an entire sequence of events. It is rare that you find something that triggers you to tell the story exactly the same way each time, and if you do find a gem that triggers this effect in your life-time it is important to never let it go. 

In my case, I was lucky to find my treasure in Italy. At the time, I never imagined that a simple article of clothing would weave my memories among the seams.  I was studying abroad in a country that crawls with energy and beauty. I bounced from Venice to Florence to Rome and lastly to Bologna where I explored as many tastes, touches, sounds and sights that one’s senses could absorb. It was during a day of shopping that I found my skirt in a boutique in the streets of Florence. I was immediately attracted to the asymmetrical shape of the beige skirt as it hung perfectly on the hanger. The Viscose fabric was light and airy. The most striking detail was the three single roses that cascaded down the side. I recall standing in front of a full length mirror turning around in circles to view it from every angle. I was in love with the way it moved, and how confident it made me feel about myself. It is funny how one piece of clothing can change your mood in a matter of minutes. As I looked at my reflection in the mirror I remember saying “I was meant to find this skirt.” 

Looking back on this journey I took many years ago I will skip the exact number of years as to not reveal a woman’s age, I know that the most important detail was the memories it was going to hold of the self exploration trip I had been on. Every time I wear this skirt, I remember the Gondola ride I took in Venice, the wine and cheese I dined on nightly and on an occasional day in Florence, the ruins I walked through in Rome, and the way children interacted with art at such an early age in Bologna. On my way out of the door I take a look in the mirror, but this time I do not find myself saying, “I was meant to find this skirt.” This time I find myself recalling the journey I took in Italy that gave me a piece of what I am today.  I am more confident. I better understand what I want to do. I now know that I love traveling the world. Without this skirt I would not be able to re-tell all of the emotions I felt during that trip. 

The skirt didn’t stop in Italy. As I continued to wear it over the years it kept logging many emotions from different stages of my life.  Such as the accomplishment I felt at graduation from Chapel Hill, the pure joy of dancing while on the town in New York City, sadness when I lost a pitch at work, and love while celebrating my nine month anniversary with my boyfriend. This skirt has a record of so many of my cherished steps.

 I was meant to find this skirt. Every time I put it on my face lights up as any woman does when she wears something new for the very first time. As I get dressed for work, an evening out with friends, or for a Sunday stroll in Central Park, I always take a moment before rushing out my door to look at myself in the mirror as I did that day when we first met in Florence. I always smile back at my reflection because I know that whatever is in store for me will be remembered forever. From the first moment when my hand reaches my door knob and I hear the first click of my heels on the ground I erupt with the same surge of confidence that came over me in the boutique. 

I don’t know when I will wear the skirt next, but I am excited for the next adventure to unfold.

DEAR TIFFANY

Tiffany & Co has made a name for themselves among the fine jewelry industry for having some of the finest silver, gold and diamonds. They have made an even bigger splash with brand recognition because of the way they package their delicate charms. I would bet millions that each of you reading this already know what I am about to say…the little blue box.  The little blue box is known by men and women all over the world. It represents luxury and class, and time and time again women open these boxes given to them by loved ones on special occasions.  Every time, a furry of emotions rushes throughout each of their bodies that erupt in the forms of smiles, joyful screams and happy tears.  Coming from someone who has been lucky to receive a few of these boxes knows how special these moments truly are. 

I grew up 30 minutes outside Washington, DC in several towns in Northern VA.  My parents divorced when I was only two and my brother was nine.  When my father decided to walk out on us I was too young to fully remember each detail like the month, the season or whether it was sunny or rainy.  However, I do recall the feeling I felt the years following that day. I was angry. I wanted nothing to do with him.  I didn’t want to see him. The mention of his name and a picture of his face made me sullen. It took me five years to speak to him again. 

I had just turned seven when I decided that I would see my father again. By this time my father had missed out on several milestones in my life: I had already had my first kiss, picked out my first doll, peddled my bike on my own and started Girl Scouts.  We had a long road ahead of us of full of twists and turns, bumps and swerves that would eventually lead us to a loving father daughter relationship. 

Let’s fast-forward to age 10. I am in 5^th grade at St Leo’s Catholic Grade School in Fairfax, VA.  As most kids this age, I was a bit awkward. I was unsure about myself, and most of all I just wanted other children to like me. It seemed a bit early, but at this age I began a love affair with pretty things.  I looked forward to shopping for new clothes, got giddy when I could try on a new pair of shoes my mother bought, and I was mesmerized by the shine of trinkets.  I was on my way to becoming a real “girly-girl.”  It was later in that year that I had my first run in with Tiffany.  

I had done it. I had graduated 5^th grade. I was very proud, and was going to celebrate with my family.  My relationship with my father had also been very steady. We were learning how to relate to each other. It is funny that all of the “girly girl” things that I loved were most adored by my father instead of my mother. I think that these things were growing out of this new partnership. Later that day my father approached me with a simple brown bag.  As soon as it left his hands, and entered mine I immediately ripped apart the bag.  The bag housed a square box that was wrapped in a white bow. The white satin ribbon was tied so perfectly hitting each side.  The perfect pairing of the bow and the little blue box ignited a fuzzy feeling inside.  My father read aloud the name that was written across the top in black print “Tiffany & Co.”  He explained to me how only special little girls receive something from here, and that it was time for me to enjoy the magic. As I opened the box I saw my first shiny gem. It was a sterling silver ballerina for my charm bracelet. I lit up like the top of a Christmas tree ornament, and embraced my father in a hug that seemed like it lasted for an eternity. We smiled at each other and said I love you.  As we let go I ran up to my room. I put the charm on my bracelet, and saved the little blue box. I found a home for it on my dresser.  It was the first of this kind of experience that I dreamed would happen again because of the moments that occurred after I opened the box. 

The little blue box became a tradition between my father and me.  It was so important that we found this because we had lost all bonds that are formed between the ages of two and seven.  During these special occasions it seemed as if we were able to freeze time that could only be shared between the two of us. Ladies, I can hear you all saying that I had hit the jackpot, and yes I had hit the goldmine of bracelets, rings, pendants and necklaces.  But most of all I had found a bond with my father that continues today. I can recall getting trinkets for Christmas, my birthday, during trips to see me in New York, and even on Father’s Day one year. After opening each gift, I would take the little blue box and stack in neatly in the shape of a tower on my dresser. All of my closest friends call it the tower of Tiffany.

I would give anything to change my father’s decision to walk away on that indescribable day, but I can’t turn back the time.  I would return all of the jewelry he gave me if it would give me back those 5 years.  I am grateful today that I have him in my life.  Every time I see a little blue box I think of how my relationship with my father has bloomed.  As I walk past my tower of Tiffany I see flashes of the days we created together.  These periods of time can never walk away from me. They are held close to my heart just like a locket.

We have come a very long way since I was two, and have formed something so special and strong that can only fit into a perfectly square blue box that is tied with a beautiful satin bow and sealed with a kiss.